pennylane731's Diaryland Diary

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go cry and write a song about it, emo kid

you never looked close enough to see

you never listened to me

all the words that i wrote

and the songs that i sang

were always about you.

every melody that i strained

every tear-soaked refrain

hoping you'd understand

i didn't ask for this

i didn't ask for it to be this way

the little bit i know

is never enough

yet it's all too much

but nothing will keep me

from speculating

nothing will stop me

from overcompensating

the vision i never see

will play in my mind

for the rest of time

can't you tell that

i feel like i'll never be good enough

won't you tell me what i lack

so i can try to be the one

i know it sounds pathetic and desperate

but i don't know how else to be

i just want to be the best

pieces of them

plus more

since i know that i'm

nothing of my own accord

nothing worth the wait

nothing of the sort

pretending to love me is more

than i could expect

if lying to myself makes me happy

please don't deny me

my 15 minutes of bliss

please don't deny me this

don't think that i'm not aware

that the prize, crowned and titled,

can be revoked

as quickly as it was awarded me

i once believe that i was worthy of the

planning, circumstance and chivalry --

somewhere along the way

those were all replaced by

blood, forgotten occasions and poverty

i can't change my fate

as the cycle repeats

ignore it 'til it goes away

or until i forget to believe

in love

in God

it was supposed to be my happy ending

but i'm rewound to the beginning

time and again

different faces, different names

but always the same song...

all i wanted was a kiss

and for you to ask me how my day was

(and care about my answer)

self sacrifice

just tell me how to be your angel

how do i win this competition for attention?

i'm not above anything anymore

9:10 p.m. - 2004-06-21

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